The Miracle of Life

For most of my life I think I took baby making to be an easy task. In elementary school my thinking was somewhat along the lines of "all of a sudden someone gets a baby put in their stomach and then a couple months later the baby falls out and you get to hold it and feed it a bottle in the church nursery".

In 5th or 6th grade Mom had a miscarriage and I remember not really understanding that. In Jr. High somehow I knew that my Mom was pregnant even though she hadn't told us yet. I had just taken health class and Mom was exhibiting "the signs". So we waited the prescribed nine months and out popped a new sister. For all the experiences above it didn't seem like much of a miracle was needed in order to make new babies for me to babysit. I think I took it for granted. And then I got married...

Background: We decided to start out with the birth control pill so that we wouldn't have to worry about anything during our first year at least. But the pill made me a raging depressed lunatic so after another crying fit Eric flushed the rest of my medicine down the toilet, (really he did-go check the drains at Wright Patterson AFB), and we did the "natural family planning" method which was great but also made me hyper sensitive to my cycles and if I was a day late I would "feel" pregnancy symptoms and tell Eric that maybe I was pregnant...and then I would start my cycle the next day and Eric would shake his head. This happened almost every month so Eric just ignored me mostly until about a year after our marriage I really was late.

My first pregnancy lasted only 3 weeks and I was devastated. Then again, right before we were supposed to move to Turkey I became pregnant again and again, lost the baby in just the first 3 weeks. It was so sad, and so sudden. We hadn't been trying to get pregnant so we weren't in the mental baby mode. To go from excitement to despair in the matter of a week was pretty wearing.

And then came the time to start trying for real. Eric had gotten back from Iraq and I had been counting my cycles, taking pre natal vitamins, and had a much better understanding of when the optimal time for conception was. And in December of '09 we found out we were pregnant again. I took the home pregnancy test, the blood test, and was sure this time that things were going to be ok. And then just two days later, the spotting and cramping started and I just knew that it another miscarriage. So on December 24th during the Christmas Eve service and for the next week our third pregnancy slipped through my body.

During my last miscarriage I told my mom that I felt so powerless. As a mother, some of you know what it feels like to want to protect and sustain your children's lives. I don't have any real experience being a parent, but as this small one slipped through, I felt powerless to protect it against death. I couldn't control my own body to keep it inside me, safe, healthy, and growing. I believe that parents can never be in complete control of their child's well-being as much as they wish they could. I have been reminded that God is the only infinite protector and sustainer of human life.

Christmas Day I was at rest mentally and emotionally. I felt prayed over and protected from bitterness and self-consuming thoughts. Christmas Day, I thought about how precious my family, Eric and this little one are to me. Even in the midst of loss these earthly things cannot compete with the preciousness of Jesus. I am SO thankful that I was able to acknowledge Him as the most precious baby that day.

Entering my sixth week of pregnancy with a healthy new baby was a sigh of relief. So far absolutely no bleeding, and our first appointment went really well. I feel so assured that this little one will make it. Our due date is November 25th 2010 and it will forever have the birth place of Las Vegas, NV. The Dr. did put me on three medications: progesterone, baby aspirin (blood thinner to make sure the blood gets into the placenta), and I have to give myself a shot every day of another form of blood clot inhibitor. My friend Julianna had to help me with the shot the first time because it's pretty freaky holding a needle to your own stomach and pushing it in yourself.

After 3 months of giving myself the injections I had a breakdown and couldn't do it anymore. It hurt and took so much courage each time to push that needle through and it didn't get easier with time. So Eric-despite his fear of needles took over and has been doing it every night since. The blood clotting disorder is called MTHFR for short-the long name is: methylenetetrahydrofolate reductase and I'll let you look that up for yourselves.

Presently I am at 20 weeks and this baby is Turbo baby. We heard the heart beat at 7 weeks, started feeling kicks at 15 weeks and it just seems like this little one is telling me, "I'm here Mommy and I love my life already!"

So the Life has visited us once again and it truly is a Miracle.

Culturing Our Friends

The past two days Eric and I, along with the Goosen's went on a sudden

ski trip up to Mt. Ercyes-the second largest mountain in Turkey and an inactive volcano if that makes the story cooler for you. As we were driving to the ski resort it was warm, rainy, totally foggy= not great ski weather. We only had another 15 minutes driving time left before we got to the resort so we were pretty bummed that Erceyes would probably be a brown mountain with no snow on it.

As soon as we started the ascent with the car the rain turned to snow. The fog intensified so much that we guided the car between the four foot high snow banks on the roadside. We reached the ski resort and the only visible sign of a mountain was the chair lift at the bottom. The visibility was so poor that we couldn't see a single skier on the hill even though every chair lift was filled with people.

Let me take this moment to explain skiing in Turkey. With only one chairlift up and one path to come down you can imagine the chaos the skiing alone was. Out of the 400 or so Turks on the mountain there are maybe 10 people not snowplowing, falling, crashing down the hill. So navigating our way through the human moguls shouting out Sola (to the left), Sa'a (to the right) proved helpful. Now if it was just inexperienced skiers alone we could have managed but wait-there's more.

You can rent skis, sleds, snowmobiles, and hiking packs. One only has to walk up the same hill all the skiers are skiing down and proceed to hike around, sled , and try skiing for the first time. So while we are swishing and swooshing our way past the 400 inexperienced Turks, insane snowmobile drivers, and backpackers on the ONLY path downhill we reach the bottom 100 meters where maybe 500 more Turks are awaiting us with their sleds, beginner ski lessons, and photo ops. Hilarity ensues.

Back to the weather report-our first time up the ski lift was an experience. The wind was maybe 30 MPH blowing icy snow, and the fog made it so that we couldn't see the ground, the chair lift cables ANYTHING. It felt like someone (let's call him Satan) was holding a leaf blower filled with ice chunks an inch away from my body.

This trip entailed a lot of car time, driving to Cappadocia, driving to Ercyes, driving back to our pansion in Cappadocia, etc. etc. etc. While talking about how much we love the Turk breakfast we came up with a plan to let our American friends in on the secret. When we move back to the states for breakfast at our house you are getting a slice of salami, white cheese, black olives, french bread with honey or jam, cucumbers, tomatoes, and tea.

I thought all of you deserved more than just a morning Turkey treat. So, because I love you, and because you didn't come visit me in Turkey, I'm taking Turkey to you. This time we're going to the bathroom in Turkey.

When you first enter my Turk bathroom, (that I will install for you in America) you will notice that the toilet has been ripped out. I told the builder, "take that away, we don't need that junk around here". All we need is a hole in the ground surrounded by some porcelain that someone painstakingly made ridges in to provide traction. Traction is very important. Then you will see a small pitcher under neath a spigot. This is what you use to wash your bodily fluids down into the hole with. Another hose is behind the toilet, this will give you the satisfaction of a third world bidet without the cost of another entire toilet-let's be economical people.

See that teeny tiny little trash can in the corner with the lid a little askew? That's where you put your toilet paper when you are done using it. The lid can be opened with your big toe-provided you have your shoe off (and we don't recommend this). So malasef (unfortunately) you must raise the lid with your hand and now you see that the lid is askew because there is so much toilet paper in there it cannot close properly. In order for your toilet paper to remain on the heap and not fall off onto the floor you will need to push your toilet paper in amongst the other used toilet paper so that it stays where trash needs to stay-in the can.

You won't really need to worry about the toilet paper issue though because our bathroom will come equipped-like all good Turk toilets do, with no toilet paper. Leaving you to face a question that has plagued the minds of many before you.

I leave the choice to you my friend but here are some other alternatives that have proved useful in the past. 1. Search pockets for anything that could be used-old receipts, dollar bills or cough drop wrappers. 2. Yell for someone to please get you a paper towel from the hand washing area-just remember we can only speak Turkish when you are in the bathroom. 3. Drip dry-the thing about drip drying is that we ALL know you're not really dry-you shake your booty as best you can to eliminate as many drips as possible. Then with a look of sheer frustration and anger on your face you shimmy your little panties up and walk defeatedly out.

Be advised. The lever at waist height is not the flusher. That is your shower for your stay in our guest bathroom. Thank you and goodnight!